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Thursday, May 2, 2013

Sneak Peek #4 From (the book version of) The Gospel According to Josh: A 28 Year Gentile Bar Mitzvah


Hey there friends, loves, and well-wishers. 

This here is another sneak peek into my book (which is finally coming out in September '13). The part you're about to read is a fun little section in the book where I've decided to leave show business all together, right as I'm getting over a severe bout of depression. Hope you enjoy...

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           Little by little I found the strength to search for a new career to pursue, something that would make me happy, something to replace acting and show business. The only requirements I had for my new and undetermined line of work were that it had nothing to do with fame, had to include writing, and had to help other people. Too many years were wasted worrying whether or not I was going to get some dinner theatre job in Wisconsin, or hoping I’d be cast as the next rookie detective paired with Jerry Orbach on Law & Order. 



* * *
INT.  LT. VAN BUREN’S OFFICE - DAY

Detective Briscoe, still in his trench coat with a coffee in hand, stands with his mouth agape alongside two dumbstruck police officers in their uniform blues. 

A camera pans briefly to what they’re staring at — the face of a dead Detective Ed Green hanging from a noose.

BRISCOE
Somebody cut him down, will ya? He shouldn’t be left here like this.

COP # 1
Why would he do it, Lenny?

BRISCOE
What if he didn’t do it?

COP # 2
You saying you think this is a homicide?

BRISCOE
What else could it be? His little girl was born yesterday...he was the happiest I’d ever seen him.

Just then, a baby-faced cop in an oversized trench coat rushes in. He is quite disheveled, out of breath, and is wearing fresh coffee stains down the front of his shirt, tie, and trenchcoat.

RIVEDAL
Hey everyone, sorry I’m late. Detective Josh Rivedal reporting for my first day. I’m here from Boise. What did I miss?

BRISCOE
Lenny Briscoe. What did you miss? Are you blind from gorging your face on all those Idaho potatoes? My partner...Ed...he’s dead.

RIVEDAL
I’m so sorry. Is it...self-inflicted?

BRISCOE
We think it’s a homicide.

RIVEDAL
Any leads?

BRISCOE
No, genius, your guess is as good as mine.

Just then, Rivedal sees an envelope peering out from underneath Lt. Van Buren’s desk. A camera zooms in for a close up on the envelope as Rivedal reaches down to pick it up.

RIVEDAL
(Reads) From Ed to Lenny. (To Briscoe) Hey Lenny, here’s something you might want to check out. It might give us a clue as to why Ed is...hanging around...

Dissolve to black. The sound of the Law & Order “Clang-Clang” is heard. The opening credits play.
* * *

How did people ever change careers before the advent of the World Wide Web? If I had my pseudo-nervous breakdown in that dark Mesozoic period pre-1989, I’d be doomed to flipping burgers in between extra work on soap operas for the rest of my existence...

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Thanks for reading!! And as always feedback is welcome :)

-J



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